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Parenting and all that


I write this after my sisters' graduation ceremony, a rather ostentatious ceremony considering that the graduation from my own college took place on the last day school and the ceremony was not very different from the usual school assembly. But times have changed, practices have changed and people have changed. 
Around me are all the proud parents of the graduates of this elite institution. When you look at some of them, it is difficult to say to whom this event assumes more significance, to them or their children who are graduating. There are some who are there simply there to fulfil their customary duty as parents but unless I am wrong, most are here because this event signifies not just a milestone in the lives of their children, but in their very own lives. As the principal kicks off the ceremony, listing the names of the elites of the elites and boasting the numerous academic accolades of the students. Names such as Harvard, Cambridge, DSTA, A Star all comes up frequently during his speech and he ends by claiming that a a 'bright future of opportunity awaits this talented group'.

I suppose this is what makes parenting truly satisfying, the proof that your child is succeeding and therefore the proof that you yourself have succeeded in the role as parents. Parenting is all about the emotional satisfaction. Of late, I have had quite a few discourses with my friend, who despite having a girlfriend is strongly against the idea of having kids. His defense is simply this ' Why would anyone ever want to have kids?' 

To be honest, in current times, it is an extremely sound defense. In the past, during the times of the extended family, having many kids ensured that there were extra hands to help the parents at work or in the house and when they became old, the kids would be there to see them through their old age. Now, having kids translates to more work and more stress. And once they reach a certain age, they move out and start their own families. If you consider the whole decision from a rational point of view, it simply does not make sense to have kids anymore.

But humans are more emotional than rational. And despite the numerous difficulties of parenting, they recognise and appreciate the little moments of joy that parenting brings along with it. Either because of that  or because the contraception did not work, they carry on having kids.  Even Ali G the comedian, acknowledged the huge sacrifice parents make for their children during his speech at the  commencement ceremony at Harvard, 

"All you fathers out there, You have made some choices. With that money (the $38000 they sped on their child's tuition fees), you could have bought a top of the range Lexus, but instead you chose to invest in your kids future."

But then he added on right after.

"Are you mental?"

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